1. Set aside a time and place to talk
Your best bet is to schedule a time, when you can all gather to talk without distractions or interruptions. Be upfront with your family about the meeting’s purpose, so no one is taken by surprise and people come prepared for the talk. Choose a setting that’s comfortable, quiet, and private. The more relaxed everyone is, the more likely they’ll be comfortable opening up.
2. Create an agenda, and set a start and stop time
Create a list of the most important points you want to cover, and do your best to stick to them. You should encourage open conversation, but having a list of items you want to cover can help ensure you don’t forget anything.
Also, set a start and stop time for the conversation. This will help keep the discussion on track and prevent people from veering too far off topic. If anything important comes up that’s not on the list, you can always continue the discussion later. Remember, the goal is to simply get the conversation started, not work out all of the details or dollar amounts.
3. Explain why planning is important
Assure everyone that the conversation isn’t about prying into anyone’s finances, health, or relationships—it’s about providing for the family’s future security and wellbeing no matter what happens. It’s about ensuring everyone’s wishes are clearly understood and honored, not about finding out how much money someone stands to inherit.
Talking about these issues is also a good way to avoid future conflict and expense. When family members don’t clearly understand the reasoning behind one another’s planning choices, it’s likely to breed conflict, resentment, and even costly legal battles.
4. Discuss your planning experience
If you’ve already created your plan, start the talk by explaining the planning documents you have in place and why you chose them. If you’ve worked with us, as your Personal Family Lawyer®, describe how the process unfolded and how we supported you to create a plan designed for your unique wishes and needs.
Mention any questions or concerns you initially had about planning and how we worked with you to address them. If you have loved ones who’ve yet to do any planning and have doubts about its usefulness, discuss their concerns in a sympathetic and supportive manner, sharing how you dealt with similar issues whenever possible.
If you have not yet worked with us on your estate plan, consider scheduling a 15-minute phone call with us to discuss what your wishes are for you and your family. And if one of your action steps is to enlist the support of a lawyer to get your planning done, schedule a Family Wealth Planning Session™ with us today.
For the love of your family
With us as your Personal Family Lawyer®, we can guide and support you in having these intimate discussions with your loved ones. When done right, planning can put your life and relationships into a much clearer focus and offer peace of mind knowing that the people you love most will be protected and provided for no matter what. Contact us today to learn more.
This article is a service of family trust lawyer Stuart Williams and the Family Wills & Trusts law firm of Lansing. We don’t just draft documents; we ensure you make informed and empowered decisions about life and death, for yourself and the people you love. That's why we offer a Family Wealth Planning Session,™ during which you will get more financially organized than you’ve ever been before, and make all the best choices for the people you love. You can begin by calling our office today to schedule a Family Wealth Planning Session and mention this article to find out how to get this $750 session at no charge.
